It is a universally acknowledged truth that a human being, who is in a relationship will have to make compromises in every sphere of their life. This brings up the question of compromise- is it really important?
Any person who is married or about to get married, or who is in a relationship for that matter, will definitely keep getting pieces of advice from well-meaning people about how they will both have to make compromises in their life to be happy. This is actually the truth of life, that you will probably have to make some compromises in all sectors of life to be successful, purely because life does not always throw ideal situations to us and we have to make the best of what we have. Even in relationships, this cardinal truth remains constant.
Any person who has lived in hostels will attest to the fact that there may be differences in the smallest of matters. One may not like too many visitors, the other may not like that the house is always super organized, and another person may get annoyed with their partner’s habitual forgetfulness. What I am trying to say is, love is easy. It is the living together part of things that lead to complications. This is because the whole lifestyle, the way of thinking, habits and preferences are different. So, both the partners have to be flexible and find a middle ground. Perhaps, try living in with each other first.
However, it also is important to draw a line on compromises. For instance, if you’re partner finds your passion for dancing, childish and shuts you down. Or say, they forbid you from meeting some of your friends because they are jealous/insecure. Do you still make compromises in such cases? Well, it depends. I think in such situations, you need to ask yourself if your partner’s objection is justified. IS this friend really a bad influence perhaps? Is the dancing really impacting you negatively?
Compromise- but one cannot compromise on fundamental things about themselves and one shouldn’t do it either. There are a few cardinal things that aren’t right or wrong. They are just the way you are. Unless essential, you shouldn’t change those things. The truth is, changing these cardinal things will leave you unhappy in the long run.
Following a simple line of questioning should help in navigating these issues. But, it is never black and white. Matters of relationships and of the heart are all subjective and a matter of your understanding. In simple words, compromising is necessary, yes. But never compromise so much that you give up your individuality. You and your preferences are just as important as the relationship.
A healthy relationship, after all, comes out of mutual respect for self and your partner.